Just staggered in today from running a marathon. Grandma's marathon to be exact. After a grueling 6+ hour drive after a short 4 hour sleep and 26.2 miles of all that life can throw at a person.
I don't know exactly what it is about a marathon that draws me in. It is a loooonnnnggg way and it sucks 98% of the time you are running it. Every. single. time. I stand at the starting line and think, "what the hell was I thinking?" and then the horn sounds and that thought gets replaced by a million others.
Most of my long runs are done on my own, so running in a crowd of 8,700 people is a big change. There are people of every sort there - tall, short, old, young, black, white. All 50 states were represented this year.
And then there are the volunteers - 6,000 of them that might otherwise have been happily enjoying their coffee at home, but were instead dealing with a lot of humanity in various stages of nerves and preparedness.
So what is it about the marathon, exactly?
One thing that is always striking to me is that we are running in the same race and the same course as whatever elite runner is at the head of the pack. Look at most runners....some of them are in incredible shape, but the majority of us are just your average Joe that is somehow able to roll out of bed enough times to get in the necessary training runs to make it 26.2 miles. The playing field is the same. What other sport, anywhere, can boast that?
A marathon requires some training. I have seen the occasional masochist sign up for (and run) a half marathon without training, but a marathon will exact a price on you - on your body, on your mind, on your soul - I have seen some of the strongest looking runners drop out right in front of me due to muscles that cease up or a heart that simply breaks. I have faced down my own inner demons that have told me to just cash in the chips and be done...."it is sssoooo much easier than running the next 17 miles" they purr in my head, "just stop and they will come transport you to the end"....
It is a self inflicted crucible. You go in, knowing that it is a long way and that you will hurt when you are done, and still you stand with your toe on the line waiting for the start. You know that you will fight off attacks from the voices in your head that cry out to stop, you will look up and set a point 200 ft, 100 ft, 40 ft, ......5 more feet ahead of where you are and focus on that. And then you get to 13 miles and you take a mental assessment of how things are going.....and they are going bad....and you have to rally....and so mile by mile you only focus on that one and pretty soon the lady running next to you looks over and says, "what mile was that?" and in all seriousness you have no idea either because you have all stopped focusing on anything other than putting one foot in front of another.
Once in a while a hand on the sideline goes out for a high five, or a sign catches your eye and provides a little cheer. There are sometimes the kind souls on the sidelines that know how to inspire, whether it be with a focused cheer just for you, or a few sips of brewed coffee, or a free slice of bacon. You focus on these small acts of kindness, you draw from them the will to go on.
This whole event is a metaphor for life. There are some - the elites- that seem to fly along and it can sometimes feel unfair that they have been gifted with this ability until you remember that this is their day job and they have a coach waking them up in the morning and demanding the pound of flesh from them every single day. So they may be elite, but they have also paid the price. For the rest of us, it's hard work. You have prepared, but there are dark times to face down out there on the road.....and there is help too.
I would like to say that it is all amazing after you cross the finish line, but it isn't....Happy to be done, yes! Happy to take a shower and take a nap, absolutely! But the pain and challenges aren't over yet. The physiology of the long distance runner is that you will run until you are out of glycogen and have burned through all the available carbohydrates that you have and then you start to burn off fat and that fat burning is a very inefficient process and it leads to more and more lactic acid build up and that acid does just what any other acid will do....it burns. I lay in bed this morning and could actually just feel both of my legs pounding in pain. All the muscles are swollen and the ligaments are strained. The run may be over, but the recovery is just beginning and that can be almost as grueling and painful as the run itself. I watched as a first time marathoner got up from the sitting position he had been in - a young kid, full of youthful vitality, but he looked about 60 years old trying to get off the ground. He said, "Oh, it is just so hard to move." I could only look at him and say, "wait until tomorrow....and the day after that. " before I smiled and shuffled off.
So why? Because all of life's emotions are here in one spot. The hero's journey is within reach of us all with just this one race: The departure, the crucible, the return. I saw a shirt yesterday that read, "Anything that is worth doing, is worth over doing." That is the marathon.
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